Television Turmoil

There is a myriad of things that a person without children takes for granted. I have touched on a few of those things in previous blogs such as going to the bathroom without being followed, drinking an entire cup of coffee while it's still hot and eating an entire meal without interruptions.  I will now add to that list "watching TV and actually being able to hear what is going on."

I firmly believe that my DVR has contributed to my maintenance of sanity after having children. I am able to record the shows I really want to watch at the same time my kids are watching the shows they like, and I get to fast-forward all the commercials when I can score an hour of free time that doesn't include cleaning, cooking, or wiping butts to sit down and watch said recorded shows.  This is usually when both girls are in bed.

Well today, some time after breakfast, my girls were playing nicely in their room.  I didn't hear any fighting or loud, alarming crashing, so I decided to take a 45-minute break and watch last night's episode of Desperate Housewives.  No sooner did I press the "play" button on the remote did my lovely children decide to migrate into the living room and have a party in front of the TV.  Between Leila shouting, "COME ON, MIA!! LET'S GO [SOMETHING UNDECIPHERABLE] COME ON!!" and Mia whining that she wants to watch Dora, I couldn't hear a damned thing.

I hit "pause".  I tell Leila to lower her voice because Mommy can't hear the TV and tell Mia to stop whining because Dora isn't on right now.  Leila runs back into her room and Mia follows her so I start up the show again.  I get just past the opening credits when Leila comes back out and asks me if I want to play catch.  I figure I can manage that while watching my show so I tell her "okay", except now she wants to stand in front of the TV to do it. 

I pause the show again.  Mia is now upset that Leila won't throw her the ball and Leila is refusing to remove herself from in front of the television so I take out their tent and set it up in the living room.  I start up the show again and before I get to the first commercial break the girls are fighting over who gets to wear the pink princess dress. (Of course they have six princess dresses, but it has to be that one.)  I try to ignore the yelling as I continue watching my show, but the lip-reading is giving me a headache, and I'm sure that I'm not getting the entire story.  I look at the clock on the cable box and realize that 20 minutes have passed since I first pressed "play" and I haven't even gotten to fast-forward the first set of commercials. 

Sometimes you have to choose your battles, and since I knew I wasn't going to win this one without forfeiting a bit of my sanity I put on a recorded episode of Sesame Street and retreated to the kitchen to wash the dishes from breakfast.

Kids: 1
Mommy: 0